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As a babysitter, there may be times when you need to deal with an upset or distressed child. It is important to fill your metaphorical childcare toolbox before babysitting in order to be able to deal with these situations in the most effective and compassionate way.

To avoid any problems, the best way to achieve this is to keep upsets from happening in the first place, rather than trying to fix the situation as it is happening. While it may not always be possible to have this kind of foresight, the following steps are good for any sitter to reflect on when they initially meet a child.

Preparation

In this phase, you can create a strong bond with children before their parents even leave the house so they will feel safe with you when the time comes to be left in your care.

* Arrange to spend some time with the child outside of the context of babysitting and when their parents are home, once at the very least. Getting to know you when they feel safe and are in a comfortable situation will help the child enjoy being in your company when it comes time for the parents to leave.

* Don’t underestimate the importance of relating to the child. They don’t want someone who will just stand around to make sure they don’t get into trouble: they want to engage with you. Spend some time putting yourself at their level by playing, listening to and asking them questions, and taking an interest in the things that matter to them most. Most kids are more than willing to tell you all about the things they like to do.

* Make them look forward to seeing you, by planning something you can do together when you arrive to babysit. Whether its a favorite game or a fun item you will bring with you, the child will most likely be enticed and excited for the next time you come over.

* Consider bringing a toy or another fun item with you to give to the child and ask them to look after it until you come over to play again. By creating a special agreement between the two of you, the child establishes a deeper bond with you and will have something extra to look forward to when you visit.

When Babysitting Begins

Don’t be surprised if any trouble arises with a child when you go to babysit them for the first time. Expecting, and being prepared for, any situation ahead of time will allow you to handle any meltdowns or upsets with compassion and understanding.

* Being left alone with someone they don’t know well is traumatic to a child at least it is the way that they see it. While it may not seem huge to you, this experience is still quite frightening for them, and it’s important to be aware of how they feel at all times.

* Tempting as it may be, don’t immediately try to distract them out of their sadness. If a friend of yours was upset about something, you wouldn’t try to get them to think about something else you’d listen. There’s nothing wrong with making suggestions of things to do, but don’t try to snap them out of its.

* Let the child know that you understand. No matter what age they are, children know when you are empathizing with their situation and will feel comforted, as well as important, when they see it matters so much to you.

* Help the child see that the current state of things is only, in fact, temporary: explain to them that their parents have gone out for a little while, but they will be home soon. Tell them that you are there to keep them safe and play until they’ve come back.

Marion webb does babysitting training. Find out more about babysitter at her website about babysitting jobs.